Chapter one is complete so I decided to post it just to give you a taste. I have been holding on to this long before it was requested and putting it out there helps to shape the rest.
So, go ahead and read it and then under the cut there will be extra information about it.
Playlist
The music is not as strict for chapter one but as the story goes on it gets more exact. One song absolutely makes this story but we haven't gotten there yet. For some reason the playlist is acting up so a link can be found here
All the Way Down - Gale Hansard
Near To You - A fine Frenzy
Chapter 1, Angel Black, White and Gray
ABWG Section
I know strange to start a story about Sofia off with Tomas' POV but I couldn't stop myself that was how it came to me. As I mentioned I am a big fan of Tomas and I could kick myself for the times that I had to stop from writing him like another male character.
I think the other reason I did this because this is probably the first installment we are going to have where Tomas is actually not on drugs so that is something to think about in regards to how he is trying to function. I wish I had more to say about Sofia but that will come in later.
I find that this story will have similarities with UL2 I couldn't help but to use it for inspiration. I hope you don't mind SH !
Je Ne' Regrette Rien
Chapter 1 and Prologue
This chapter was just a little head start. I realize that it may have seemed like Clara doesn't have a daughter but she was lying to Rainer. I know I failed the Bechdel Test in every other story and someone mentioned how well I was doing here but it was almost unintentional
Pictures
Detectvive Olive Rainer, I can picture Kate Walsh
Becuase I always pick a new one Natalie Portman in her Dior ad reminded me of Clara.
Chapter 2, JNRR
Chapter 1 and 2 were originally one chapter but I split them up for "tension" but I feel like this is a god set-up point.
Connections
In a complete non-cannon way the events that happen between chapter 1 and 2 of JNRR would be Standing In The Rain. But ABWG takes place in Summer 2010 and JNRR takes place in December 2011 so therefore it can not actually happen it just might explain why Clara appeared the way she did when I wrote that.Chapter 2
So, where is Clara going now that she has her sister's passport ?
Playlist
Features 2 versions of the same song Broken by Seether and Amy Lee.
Chapter 2
Wow, just wow these serials are so amazing. I can deal with the whiplash if we keep getting double serial post.
ReplyDeleteOMG, Yes ! I so saw Juliet as someone I just couldn’t place my finger on it and it was so Emma Watson. She is so fierce. Do you have pics for Clara’s sisters ?
ReplyDeleteI wonder if The Clair/Martin are like Tomas/Sofia. The comment about their adult lives meaning nothing without the other half of the couple. I can’t find the exact line.
ReplyDeleteI have no idea why but, I imagine Allen looks like Ryan Gosling. Like, I have had this image since Angels. Now, I imagine he is older.
ReplyDeleteIt is so hard to believe that one person writes both of these, they are so amazing in different ways ! Maybe it is because we know each other personally but, I can really sense the personalness ABWG. Do you ever feel vulnerable writing ?
ReplyDeleteAlso, this is totally abastract but, the way Juliets ‘psychic powers work’ kind of remind me of writing. often she saw the one thing that ran through their mind over and over again and that was the circumstances that lead to their death. Usually it was easy.
Also, steal whatever you want from me. You do amazing things, hon.
/end long comment
I can see that black, white gray title coming into play. The situation with Allen is not just black and white. Did you mention a while back that the whole Allen thing was based on a true story. That is so sad. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteI was so going to mention the whole starting with Tomas’s POV but, I feel like we learn more about Sofia through Tomas.
ReplyDeleteI feel bad for Sofa but, she is so much stronger than before. SHe is dealing with her husband, her rapist and a baby.
ReplyDeleteWait, how long after the end of S&A does ABGW take place ? Wasn’t Elijah walking in the end.
ReplyDeleteWow, Tomas is being such a jerkass. I was so sure he was going to kill himself in the beginning.
ReplyDelete^^
ReplyDeleteITA agree with the Tomas comment but, I have always loved the fact that he is an artist. For some reason it makes him seem less douche--y. Tortured artist, maybe?
Oh, BTW, I love Amy Lee. She is in Evanescene, right ? I could listen to some of her songs all day.
ReplyDeleteIf I had to choose I woud want more JNRR because it is so mysterious and I want all the answers from the cliffhanger but, I am interested in ABWG too. Lol, not that u were asking which one we want.
ReplyDeleteJNRR just got so good. Who was the first person Clara encountered at the house ?
ReplyDeleteI think the DeLune’s problem is they care to much about their name and not enough about the family. I always thought Clara was kind of cold but, she did the right thing being there for her mother.
ReplyDeleteYou said chapter 1 of JNRR was hard to start but, I think it started off really great. Also, if you count Rose as a female charcter you pass the Belchel test.
ReplyDeleteYou said chapter 1 of JNRR was hard to start but, I think it started off really great. Also, if you count Rose as a female charcter she passes the Belchel test.
ReplyDeleteI know, I know he is kind of a jerk but, I feel so bad for Tomas. Can we assume he will never walk again ? Plus, I think he is doing the good thing by telling people about his mother’s death.
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ReplyDeleteDespite the gap in their class Roger DeLune had always been kind to Rainer's father, he even helped put Olive through school. They hadn't been particulary close as the years went on something she suddenly regretted
Who is the ‘they’ she is referring to ? her father or Olive.
Fabulous chapter, hate the cliffhanger. Will this be a whodunnit ?
Are Sofia and TOmas living in a hotel or in an apartment complex ? Petal Brooke is such a pretty name.
ReplyDeleteIt seems like Tomas and Sofia are both ashamed of each other. They have two seperate lives and issues.
ReplyDeleteMr. Fierro is so meticulous and OCD, it is so in character. He is my favorite character that you write.
ReplyDeleteWait-- is Tomas trying not to curse as much ? Looks like he is seeking some kind of redemption but, then he goes and calls Sofia a bitch.
ReplyDeleteHmm . . . I think there is a reason we don’t hear Martina’s sisters name.
ReplyDeleteI can’t believe Sofia would be a waitress after being a nurse. Isn’t there like a constant nurse shortage ?
ReplyDeleteSo, what job did Tomas have in NYC that he left ? Was he working at that tattoo shop ?
ReplyDeleteI think Sofia will end up living in Petal Brooke, she seems happier there than in NYC. I would move to Petal Brooke.
ReplyDeleteTomas was awful to Mrs. Fenton. They could have just politely asked her to leave and then called the police or something. IDK, this whole thing is just a messy,messy situation. Now that I leave this comment I realize how much I need more of that story. I’ve missed Tomfia.
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ReplyDelete@ June - I almost made a Willow Smith Joke
@ July - Yes, those will come next post
@ Sara - I can see this.
@ Angelic_Spirit - I haven't thought about what he would look like.
@ Shawna - Yeah, but it's wierd it helps me deal. Love your comment honey !
@ Nybarista - Yes, I did. more to come in my memoir
@ Holli - me too
@ sugarcookie - I wouldn't say she is dealing with the baby.
@ Cerie - whistles
@ Selena - I know I know but he is aware of how he is acting.
@ Quinn - He is also off drugs for the first time in his life. It's not really an excuse though
@ Shawna - I think Amy Lee is Evanescence, no offense if there are others in the band
@ Princess - The mystery in JNRR is a lot of fun for me while ABWG doesn't require as much strategy.
@ Illia - Do you mean Colin her Brother in Law or the mourner who was leaving. If it was the mourner who as leaving I don't know.
I miss Tomfia too but, JNRR is addictive. Oh, not to be *that guy* but I think it says JNRN in the url instead of JNRR. Oh, the acronyms.
ReplyDeleteWhy did Clara use her sister’s ID again ? I mean it looks like they are all suspects in the murder.
ReplyDeleteOnly Clara Delune would be blasting classical music and only Addison Fierro would be using a record player.
ReplyDeleteIm sure there is a picspiration for the house ? This is so randome but, I feel like Clara is always hitting her ankles on something. Not that I am saying her clumsiness is a personality trait or anything.
ReplyDeleteUgh, speaking of which it is so not fair Smeyer gets another book turned to movie and there is no LL film. You should be one of the Cobalt writers writing the screen play.
ReplyDeleteIs the small amber light she sees a cigarette or is it a lighter ? For some reason I associate the color amber with flames.
ReplyDeleteI’m not sure if this will come up in the serial (I doubt it) but, what will Rosalie do for school ? Shouldn’t she be in Kindergarden soon.
ReplyDeleteOkay, hmm . . .I think Clara or Fierro did it.I mean they have nothing to lose. Natalie Portman looks so stunning in that image.
ReplyDeleteI wonder why Juliet can see the things she sees. Will she tie into the other characters past somehow ?
ReplyDeleteWhere do you think the Delune women thought Rose was ? I bet they think Clara killed her.
ReplyDelete^^
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of killing people do they know that Peter is dead ?
So, the man Rainer didn’t recognize was probably Fierro (or Emile ? no ?) so, who is the woman.
ReplyDelete^^
ReplyDeleteI’m going to go ahead and say Lucie but, I really need more information.
The fonts and layout keep changing. Is this the final version ?
ReplyDelete@Lile, damn I was going to make a Willow Smith joke but, thought better of it.
ReplyDelete*whip it real hard*
@ Lile I mean the house in South England. Who is she talking to. she asks about the nanny ?
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ReplyDeleteNo, I had to start over ):
@ Heidi - Very true
@ Trish - I don't really count Rose, but in DSI they did not really get along.
@ Rei - He will never walk again
@ appletini - The Rainers and the DeLune's were friends. Specifcally Martin with Olive and her dad (whose name I like to think is Ollie)
@ Bostongirl - It is one of those long-term hotel suites
@ Topaz - I'm not entirely convinced, but you did catch something
@ peacegoddess - Interesting you caught that
@ Daisy - You caught that. Yes he is not cursing around Elijah but he does curse in his. . .what's the word narrative ? Now, I'm not sure how I feel about what Tomas called Sofia. I have to think on it.
@ Tabbi - You guys are good. Yes there is a reason
@ Carter - It's easy tax-free money.
@ carleigh - Yes
@ EmileLover - Yes, however some bad things did happen to her there.
@ Lana - Tomas was trying to protect Sofia. They didn't know what she was going to do.
@ Slodger - I did that so it would file underneath in the editing program.
@ Lia - She doesn't want Rainer to know she is leaving the country.
@ Ashlyn - Yes
@ Seneca - Yes there is and isn't hitting furniture what ankles are for ?
@ Rosie - I don't think I want that
@ Trichelle - Yes, he is lighting a cigarette
@ Ellie - She is being home schooled by her Nanny (becuase this doesn't come up)
@ Mia - the perfume is amazing
@ Helena - No
@ Mal - Hate to say this. . . but they really don't care.
@ Aprilshowers - I knew someone was going to asks this and at this point I am going to say no.(I mean Mr. Fierro knows he is dead but he isn't goint to tell her.)
@ Wendi- Is it ? is It ?
@ Maci - is it ? IS IT ?
@ Wilson - Yeah, I didn't like the marker font on the post title
@ Erik - LOL, honey
ReplyDelete@ Cerie - she is talking to Mr. Fierro.
@
I don't know if I can do these double post if there are so many wonderful comments !
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